Baby Smiling in the Backseat asked this question as part of her Thoughtful Thursday post yesterday (click over – she has some good insight and the comments are interesting as well):
Do you post your children’s names and photos online (or, if you don’t have children, what have you imagined you would do)? If so, on what internet platforms do you disclose and on what platforms are you secretive? Why? Has your ALI blog made a difference in your decision?
I thought this would be an interesting question to address here for a variety of reasons. I have friends who have private blogs and do not blog publicly and I know numerous people who are totally out regarding their blogs and sharing their lives, children’s stories, and photos with the world.
Obviously, I do post my children’s names and photos online – both on my blog and on Facebook. I announced the names of our twin girls on this blog just hours after we found out we were having girls.
I’m an overly anxious, Type A, but I honestly do not worry about stalkers/child molesters/what have you on my blog. Seriously, it’s in the computer. I think the chances of something happening to Bo in numerous other situations (riding in the car, playing in the pool, going to an amusement park) are higher than someone actually stalking him on my blog.
I agree with Dooce that the internet isn’t really any more exposed than taking my children out in public and that if someone wants to hurt me or my child they will find a way — whether I am a blogger or not. I also feel that the benefits of blogging out way the very small risk involved (Just as putting your child in the car to go to the store has more benefits than negatives. I allow Bo to ride in the car every day and the risk of death/injury in a car is actually quite high – especially as compared to his risk due to my blogging.) I’ve made numerous close friends and by sharing my story feel like I have given a purpose to my infertility.
I think many bloggers like to be anonymous because it allows them more freedom with their writing. It allows a freedom and an honesty that is difficult to match when you know that not only are your good friends inside and outside of the computer reading what you write but so is your mom, MIL, best friend, local bank teller, your vet, and possibly your doctor. Being a “known” blogger adds a lot more pressure and a lot more worry about what other people think and how they will respond to what you are writing.
My first two years of blogging are now private and I must grant permission for anyone to enter the original Sticky Feet blog. For the first two years, I attempted to remain anonymous and failed. Now, I feel like it is just easier and better for everyone involved if I blog openly and with the understanding that everyone/anyone can read my words. Does it impact what I say? Sometimes. But I do my best to still say what I need to say without feeling the need to protect myself from what others think or their reactions to my words.
Maybe, as Bo and the girls become older, it will be more difficult for me to blog openly about them and our lives. I am sure when the girls are teenagers they will be full of angst about everything I do as most girls are at that age. But for now, Bo doesn’t know what a blog is and most of my entries regarding him are meant to be cute and positive. If anything, I think he will look back on my words here and see how crazy I am about him. 
But this will definitely be an issue that I address as the kids become older. And if it ever becomes an issue and one of my kids asks me to stop writing about them, I will. And then I’ll become a food blogger. 
But this will definitely be an issue that I address as the kids become older. And if it ever becomes an issue and one of my kids asks me to stop writing about them, I will. And then I’ll become a food blogger. Friday’s Feature at Sticky Feet Part Deux is Ask Jamie. Feel free to email me or leave a comment with any question you would like for me to answer. Anything is fair game!
This is exactly how I feel about blogging about my family. If someone wants to find us they are going to whether or not I blog.
Just to toss this in as a mom of teens and toddlers.
The teens don't care.. and when they do… they seem to love it. It's a way to keep up with Mom.. the family and funny stories they don't realize are going on around them
Obviously, I was completely open. I wasn't and still am not worried about something dangerous happening. I felt the need to do something different because of a specific incident.
That said, my parents, ILs, etc – they don't know about the blog. I don't know how I would write if I thought they were reading.
It's an issue close to me right now, and I don't know if I've done the "right" thing in the past or now. I'm proud of my blog in a way, but I also never intended it to cause problems "in real life", either.
I sometimes stop when I am blogging about my teenager because I know that age is really sensitive, but then I usually continue because I know that he or his friends are not going to see my blog post anyway. All my posts are honest – I work hard at being authentic even when it shows my shortcomings because my hope is that we, as moms, all learn from each other.
On my family blog I am completely open and honest, but then again I don't think anyone other then my mother reads it, so there is that… On my surrogacy blog I do give a little bit of anonymity, unless I have the permission of my intended parent to post names and/or photos of their little one, and I keep my actual location mum, out of respect for them. I tend to agree with yourself and Dooce, the bad guys will find me if they're looking, and it won't be through my blogs.
Sabrina ICLW
This is just my opinion, but being from a different generation than you, I think that makes a difference, too.
I would be very leary of posting names, pictures of my children on a blog. There are so many perverted people in this world anymore. Fortunately, thanks to the internet you can locate where convicted sex offenders live in this local area and there are quite a few..
It is a scary time..
That is my 2 cents.
Mom
I like having a bit of anonymity for myself and my beloved… thus I have kept our real names out of my blog. But that hasn't stopped me from posting pics of us. I think, if the situation arises (read: if I actually ever get and stay pregnant) I will use pseudonyms for our little ones, but still post pics. I agree that there is a bit of danger in everything we do, but it can't hurt to be a little cautious… can it?
Thanks for answering the Thoughtful Thursday question in so much detail!
Random follow-up question: do you ever worry about your students finding your blog?
I completely agree with you! I have a friend who's husband is scared to death about putting their family "out there". I know everyone has a right to their own opinion so I respect that when I am doing blog posts.