Spanglish asks:
Are you hoping for specific genders this time around? Do you think it would be fun or scary to be a mom of three sons?
Honestly, I don’t care. It can be two girls, two boys, a boy and a girl, whatever. As long as they are healthy and I manage to keep them tucked safely away in my uterus for the required amount of time, that is all that truly matters.
That said, I have thought about genders. For some reason, before Bo was born, I thought I would have girls. But then, almost as soon as I was pregnant with Bo, I strongly felt that he was a boy. I dreamed about boys. I was drawn to little boys. Since then, I’ve felt like I would only have boys.
However, not long before the start of this IVF cycle, I started to find myself strangely drawn to girl stuff. I’m definitely far from the pink ruffles, ribbons, and bows type but some of the girls clothing and such suddenly started looking more appealing.
If I had to guess, I would say there is one boy and one girl in there — based on heart rates and just my overall gut feeling. My second guess would be two girls.
If it is two boys, I will not be disappointed. I think raising boys would be great and I think I’ll be a better Mom to boys than to girls anyway… (I’m more scared of the idea of parenting three children. I just never pictured myself with three!) I’m just not that girly and the thought of putting a bow in a little girls hair kinda gives me the heebie jeebies. I was the little girl who was much happier in jeans and a flannel shirt, wore a shirt that looked like a tie for my kindergarten picture, loved to play in mud, colored on the face of my Cabbage Patch dolls, and was just generally un-girly. I finally started wearing dresses without protest when I hit high school — mostly because I figured out that boys liked them…
Mike and I have already agreed there will be no frilly stuff if we do have a girl (Mom take note!). I know that my mom would really like to have a granddaughter and I know that my MIL wouldn’t mind either, having raised two boys herself. I would be disappointed for my mom, because if I don’t have a girl, she will never have one (however, she did have me, tomboy that I was…). However, I hold out hope that my MIL will one day have a granddaughter from her other son and his wife. So while I wouldn’t be disappointed myself, I would be sad for my mom because she will never have a granddaughter.
I’ve never really understood people who are hung up on gender or who are disappointed by the gender of their child. I think that type of mentality makes even less sense to me because of my infertility background. A baby is a blessing — who cares if it’s a boy or a girl??
Needless to say, I will be thrilled, no matter what the genders are as long as they are healthy and I am able to carry them to term.
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Grammie doesn’t care about the gender of the babies. I’m just praying for healthy babies. Yes, Jamie, grammie would love a baby girl to love and spoil but after Bo it doesn’t matter much. Bo is the sweetest and the most adorable little fellow that there ever was…. and he is growing up so fast. These new babies are a blessing!! Grammie will love them all unconditionally.
In all likelihood it will probably be a boy and a girl. You are statistically more likely to have one of each although a I do know one person who had two girls after IVF and one person how had two boys. And don’t worry about the girlie thing. I don’t think I have ever put a bow in my daughters hair (in fact, she won’t let me put anything in her hair) and most of the time she is in pants or jeans. However, there are some great girls clothing out there so if you have a girl I think you will enjoy that aspect!
Well said! I agree completely. I would never want to be ‘disappointed’ in having a boy or a girl, so I’ve never set myself up to “wish” for one over the other.
I still find it hilarious that you don’t like girly stuff, but you ended up being state fair queen. I still remember you learning to walk in those heals. *snicker*
Jenny
Our babies’ heart rates always suggested one boy, one girl but we ended up with two girls. I was pretty freaked out by the amount of frilly crap we received at our baby showers — yesterday I came across two pairs of booties that say “Lil Flirt” and promptly put them in the donation bin — but there are a lot of fun, funky options too. I think that the mother’s attitude sets the tone for her daughters anyway: If a woman is very high maintenance, then her daughters will probably be more princess-y.
I don’t really care for all the ribbon and frilly stuff on the girl clothing either — you’ve seen what M wears (I don’t consider it frilly, but maybe it is). But there is definately a huge amount of clothing for girls and that is the problem for me. It is all so cute that it is really hard to stop. Especially with shoes…there are only so many types of boy shoes that seem necessary (dressy, tennis, and sandal). With girl shoes I feel like she “needs” all the styles and in different colors too! Okay, I guess *I* just want them and that is the problem. Oh well…
I always said it didn’t matter as long as they were healthy.
I am voting that at least one girl is in there.
You’re a braver woman then I am. I was TERRIFIED to be a mother to a boy! I learned the hard way that NOTHING stays clean on them, the hard way. Boys are a lot of fun though. Great question and answer. Have a GREAT weekend!
Thanks so much for answering the question!!
I always imagined myself a mother to sons and, like you, figured I would make a much better mother to sons than to a daughter. Even my parents commented that I should have a son because while I was very much a girly girl when I was little, I was also very much outdoorsy and not squeamish and did great with my younger brothers.
I was (and am) nervous about being a mom to a daughter… I want to save her from the double standards and protect her from body-image bullshit and all the other mess that goes with being a girl in the world, but having a girl — OH MY GOD my daughter is so much fun. Having a son would be great, too I’m sure — but my point is, even though you feel in your heart that you’re suited to raising boys, you’ll be an amazing mom to a girl too. She’ll be a better girl BECAUSE of you.
As for the frilly stuff — we always get frilly stuff for her in the form of gifts, but there are tons of fun clothes more along the “funk” line of things.
I am just stopping by from MBC to fave your blog on Technorati and give you a little comment love. Nice to check out your blog!
Also, I love love love the family picture. Absolutely beautiful!!!
I have two girls and a boy and I always thought the same as you did about gender. I remember someone saying when pregnant with my son “This one better be a boy right?” because I had two girls. I wanted to deck her.
We never got tons of frilly stuff for our girls. But we’re not picky either. Besides, by the age of four they have their own VERY definite opinions on what they want to wear no matter what you say!