Life After Infertility

I’ve come to a shocking revelation recently — I can deal with pregnant people!

I’m sure those of you who are fertile beyond all repair (my version of FUBAR) are rolling your eyes right now. But seriously, this is a big step for me. Two years ago, a pregnancy announcement would have me curled into a ball on the couch for the rest of the day. A year ago, when I was pregnant, I dealt with it more rationally, but I was still very bitter about the cards that infertility dealt me.

Recently, two people I know in real life (I never really had an issue with my online friends pregnancies — probably because they were hard fought after a battle with infertility — ya know, the reason we became friends online to begin with!) announced February due dates. And honestly, I am happy for them. My gut reaction is to warn them to go to the movies, go out to dinner, read books, sleep, and relax as much as possible, but I don’t have any feelings of ill-will toward them.

What’s changed? Well, obviously, I have Bo. I now know both the joys and the hardships that parenting holds. I also have a more realistic view of pregnancy, childbirth, and mothering.

I’ve also been watching a lot of John and Kate Plus Eight in the evenings with Mike. I can’t even begin to tell you the number of times that show makes me say, “Are you sure we don’t just want 1?”

I guess the most phenomenal change is that I no longer feel like I am missing out on this amazing experience that everyone else gets to have and that seems to happen to them so easily…

I battled infertility and I won.

I am a mom. I have a baby. I am complete.

***I just have to hope that my new found peace doesn’t leave when I begin my battle with secondary infertility — coming this January (barring any unforeseen events) to a blog near you.