Symbolism

After not being able to wear my wedding set since September, (due to swelling and weight gain) I finally became ‘officially’ married again this weekend when we picked up my ring from the jewelry store that Mike’s grandfather use to own.

When Mike and I first started talking about starting a family, I was pretty adamant that I would receive a sparkly gift for bringing a child into this world. As our infertility journey progressed I cared less and less about a sparkly gift and more and more about the real gift — a healthy child.

By the time I was finally pregnant with Bo I told Mike that I did not want anything. Bo is the best gift and that I felt it would be smart to save the money to contribute to his college fund.* Mike said he agreed and we both left it at that.

Needless to say, about an hour after Bo’s birth — after Bo had his first feeding and we were admiring him — Mike dug around in his bag and brought out a little gold box.

I am sure my jaw dropped, as it often does when I’m shocked. I remember Mike saying, “You didn’t think I was going to get you anything, did you?” I truly did not think he would. More and more often we do not purchase gifts for each other on holidays — instead choosing to spend the money on more practical objectives.

My wedding set, like the rest of my life, is different now. Inside the little gold box was a ring that matches my wedding band. I had expressed interest in some day receiving another band but I thought it would be for an anniversary in the future. Instead, Mike gave it to me on the night when we officially made the transition from being a married couple to a family. In my mind this ring is more special than it ever would have been on an anniversary because it represents so much more. It represents Bo. It is a symbol of our family.

Today, when I wanted to pull my hair out at work, I happened to glance down at my hand. I was instantly reminded of two of the most important people in my life — my husband and my son.

To some people, sparkly gifts are insignificant — and while I wouldn’t trade Mike and Bo for a million diamonds — I wear my rings with pride because they are a representation the most important aspects of my life, even when I can’t be with them. To me, my ring is a symbol of love and the amazing real gifts that I have in my life.

* Yes, we did still start Bo’s college fund. Given the current state of the economy my ring will probably be a better investment than his mutual funds anyway…